the buddhists say that love is understanding, and in the absence of understanding there is no love, only the opposite of love.
this is a lesson i have learned many times over in the past year....
to have a person "see" you and say, "you are okay, just as you are" and mean it is understanding and unconditional love.
to have a person live with you and say, "I cannot understand who you are or what you want. you need to be what i want", is not love
to have a friend say, "i love you, but I don't understand" is not love- it is a barrier
to say to your daughter, when she says things that hurt you to your core, "i get why you feel that way. i understand." that is love.
to actually love someone begins with loving yourself. accepting who you are. somehow, that is a scary proposition for many. i can only be truly responsible for me. when my home is created within me, then i can love others- with understanding and acceptance.
this is a lesson i am happy to have learned...
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